Well near the beginning of the year, Kara's dad Robert decided to call me up one evening and complain about taxes. It started a fight. So before I knew about how taxes worked and withholding of taxes from our jobs, I would share the tax refund with Robert that I received when I claimed Kara on my taxes. Since Robert lived in another state he wasn't allowed to claim her. When I met Dan he asked why I was even sharing that money with him. I figured I was trying to be nice to my ex and keep things smooth. Last year I told Robert I was claiming her and not sharing the return because we had many expenses from medical and eye doctor therapy sessions. He was fine with it because he was going to claim Amanda, his at the time girlfriend. They have since gotten married. This year comes and Robert askes if I am sharing the return. I say no because I have learned that the taxes withheld come back to us as the refund if we don't owe the IRS. By claiming Kara we don't pay in to taxes. We no longer get the Earned Income Credit because Dan and I make more than max to claim that credit. We claim dependent child care and such though.
So since I had claimed Kara, Robert proceeds to bitch that the money he does give to us is more than enough to support her and he should be allowed to claim her. I simply state that Kara is with me more, and he has no right to claim her at all. Thus he starts threatening that he will take her more than 50% of the time. Which my reply was he was being stupid because she is enrolled in school and has a settled life here. Then he starts personally verbally attacking me, and I end up hanging up on him, and I called his bluff and hired an attorney.
There was already a child support order in place for the exact same reason of he runs his mouth and wasn't giving me support just because of who I was dating. We have been trying to get the custody agreement in place with things that are still the same. He only gets her certain times, I claim her on taxes, and summer visits are only 6 weeks. Her education sufferes when she visits his house because I honestly believe they plop her infront of the tv or allow her to play her Nintendo DS the whole time. After a week of spring break she comes back a Zombie and not my little girl that I sent up there.
So this whole time I have been waiting on him to get this done. He will end up paying more child support which he said wasn't going to happen. About two weeks ago I called and asked what is going on with the agreement and if he disagrees with any part of it. He says he only needs clarification on a few parts, but he wants to go through the lawyers. After another week he finally contacts his lawyer to tell her he wants to revise parts of the agreement which should have happened this past summer when my lawyer had to draft it up because he keeps dragging his feet. That and his wife has graduated from law school and thinks she is an expert in the law of wyoming which she only passed the Montana State Bar, not Wyoming. Besides that it is a conflict of interest, she cannot represent her own husband. She is an idiot to be giving her "so called guidance."
It is just a bunch of bullshit waiting on him for this, and I am about at my wits end. I know he is probably getting kick out of upsetting me, but really it is hurting Kara if this is not settled by Winter Break. This Winter Break is suppose to be his year, but if the agreement isn't finalized I will be keeping her from him in around about legal way.
His attitude about this whole thing just shows that he doesn't care about Kara, but only wants to use her to get back at me. I almost wish I would have asked him to sign away his rights in the very beginning.
I know this is partly my fault for having a child with him, which I don't regret having Kara. I am just tired of all of the dragging of feet.
Now I sit waiting on hearing back from his lawyer, and I know we will be denying his requests. I am almost wondering if I will have to sue him in order for this to be put in place. Trying my best to be patient, but to be perfectly honest it hasn't been my strongest virtue.
It has been affecting my mood, and I will admit I have slacked at things at home. Dan seems irritated with me, but at the same time I feel like I should be allowed time to slack. I don't always have things together, but apparently if I have a break down it inconvenience others. At times I want to scream at the top of my lungs and say, "Fuck You All! I need this and if you don't like it, get the fuck out!"
Sighs....so there it is.